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What is Anger?
There are dozens of ways anger can be described. Here are a few of them.
Being…
Annoyed Upset Frustrated Mad Furious
Disappointed Vengeful Resentful Hurt Unforgiving
Enraged Irritated Displeased Impatient Bitter
They all boil down to this simple explanation.
Anger is when we expect ourselves, someone else, or anything else to be different than it is.
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How Do We Deal with Anger?
As you read through these, understand probably everyone has used some of these, if not all, at one time or another.
1 WE CAN TREAT ANGER AS “NORMAL”
Most of us have spent a good portion of our lives thinking anger is a normal part of life, justified, and we just need to live with it. The problem is that when we “normalize” anger, we begin to think there are no real benefits in releasing it.
2 WE TRY TO PUSH OUR ANGER UNDERGROUND
This way usually requires us to numb or desensitize how we feel—so it is not uncomfortable or disturbing us any longer.
Some Things We Could Do to Numb or Desensitize How We Feel
Take Pills Drink Alcohol Take Drugs Overeat
Shop Stay Crazy Busy Binge-watch Overwork
Play Games Drink Caffeine Smoke Cigarettes
Over-exercise Overdo Social Media Activities
These activities are not wrong to do!
But you know if you are using them to push your anger underground.
3 WE COULD LASH OUT IN ANGER
This is when we physically do something to vent by using one or more of our 5 senses—what someone can see, hear, touch, taste, or smell.
What are Some Examples of Lashing Out in Anger?
Cry Yell Say curse words
Break something Hit something Injure someone
Criticize someone Complain Drive recklessly
4 WE COULD GET SICK
Sickness is almost always some form of anger internalized. Instead of yelling or hitting someone, we let it fester inside our bodies.
We want ourselves, someone else, or a group to be punished for what we think is wrong.
When this happens, we get ill to make the guilty party feel bad for what is happening or what did happen. The problem with this way of dealing with anger is that we have to hurt our bodies to do it.
5 WE COULD USE OUR ANGER TO PRACTICE OUR INNER WORK
What is Inner Work?
Most of us orchestrate our lives around what we see, hear, taste, touch, and smell with our physical bodies, paying very little, if any, attention to our thoughts and feelings about it.
Inner work focuses on controlling and transforming our thoughts, perceptions, attitudes, and emotions, so we can tap into insights from a higher source.
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How Can We Release Our Anger?
1 ANGER IS A CHOICE
Realize all definitions of anger are a choice. Do we want to uphold the belief “that guilt is real” or do we want to believe “everything happens to help us learn and practice how to unconditionally love.”
2 REALIZE THE ANGER WE GIVE, WE GET
Understand what the thoughts and emotions we think, we will get back. That means angry people will end up attracting other angry people. If we cast blame on others, others will cast blame on us. If we want others punished for what they did or who they are, we will be punished in some form for what we did and who we are.
Instead, think thoughts like…
“Let me be at peace with everyone and everything.”
“Let me see them at peace with everyone and everything.”
3 ASK FOR HELP
If you believe in a higher source, then you can ask to change your perception of what you are angry about.
Examples…
“Let me see _________(individual or group) differently.”
“Let me see _________(the situation) differently.”
“Let me see myself differently.”
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I have a QUIZ that may help you get realize how angry you are…
Is the Changing World Stressing You Out?
Also, check out the Inner Work on my website.
And, if you need an advisor to help you on your quest, contact Vickie Champion for a coaching and consulting session at a discounted price.