Vickie Champion

"I inspire and strengthen lives one thought at a time."

Romance: 10 Signs You are in the 4th Dimension

Romance in the 4th dimension is different. It is not focused totally around being with the right person, expecting them to say and do things to please you. The 4th dimension takes the responsibility of your happiness off your partner’s actions, and places it on your own state of mind.

 

Here’s Signs You are in the 4th Dimension Mindset with your Romantic Relationships…

When you…

1   Try to take the relationship day by day, not trying to secure a future together. Therefore, you make very few promises, if any.

 

2   Believe sacrifice is not a requirement for being in a romantic relationship. That means you are truly honest and trust your intuition, instead of pleasing your partner’s current wishes.

 

3   Realize that no one can really fill your needs but you, and your inner guide. You have learned how to feel worthy, feel safe, provide adequate income, and how to enjoy life with or without being in a romantic relationship

 

4   Become aware that making yourself or your mate feel guilty for wrongdoings doesn’t help the relationship or make you feel better long term.

 

5   Eliminate the need to define who you think your partner is and count on them to always live up to your expectations. There is no need to describe in detail their personality, appearance, or what you think they will do in any situation. Without that limitation, the 4th dimension allows your loved one to grow and change in your eyes.

 

6   No longer treat your loved one as a possession, someone who is yours and yours only. This ends undue jealousy and envy from flaring up.

 

7   Practice being honest, but not apologizing for your critical opinion of what you think you did wrong.

 

8   Are vulnerable, and easily express your honest thoughts and feelings. There is no need to hide the truth or tell white lies, even if this possibly jeopardizes your relationship.

 

9   Define intimacy as extending loving thoughts to your partner, whether you are physically next to them or not. The emphasis is on what you feel in your heart, not necessarily only what you do, see, hear, or touch.

 

10   Embrace changes in the relationship.

 

Maybe all the pain in your romantic relationships that you experience is coming from trying to stay in the 3rd dimension.

You have a choice! You can either be one of the last holdouts in the 3rd dimension, or jump on the bandwagon and rise to the 4th and the 5th dimensions. Relationships are a lot easier and more fun when you move up.

Visit the entire 3rd, 4th and 5th dimension section and take the Quiz, What Dimension are You Mostly in?

Are You Ready to Get Rid of the 3rd Dimension Mindset?

This self-study course helps you change the mindset that you have about yourself and the world around you. With this program you will be able to let go of the pain you experience in the 3rd dimension and finally feel worthy. For more details.

Also check out the Quiz, How Worthy Do You Feel?

 

Keeping Secrets & A Course in Miracles

Most people have a secret or two they are not revealing, or at least not revealing to certain individuals. Are you one of them? Maybe you are ashamed of something you did in the past. Perhaps you’re not sharing a belief or a habit that everyone doesn’t approve of. Whatever your secret is, it is common to want to keep it hidden away from other’s critical take on it.

A Course in Miracles might help you see secrets differently.

Here’s what it says…

1“The escape from darkness involves two stages: 2 First the recognition that darkness cannot hide. 3 Second, the recognition that there is nothing you want to hide or even could.  This step brings escape from fear. 4 When you have become willing to hide nothing, you will not only be willing to enter into communion but will also understand peace and joy.”

Let’s Break Each Sentence Down and Explain it…

1“The escape from darkness involves two stages:

1   To me, this means if we are ashamed of or think our secret is wrong, we will consider it as “darkness.”

 

2 First the recognition that darkness cannot hide.

2  We need to realize we cannot keep secrets. At some level everyone knows we are hiding something from them, whether they ask us about it  or not. A Course in Miracles emphasizes “minds are joined” and that “there are no private thoughts.” That explains telepathy and how some psychics are so accurate.

 

3 Second, the recognition that there is nothing you want to hide or even could. This step brings escape from fear.

3  Deep down inside we don’t want to be ashamed of who we are, what we do, what we have done, or our beliefs.  The phrase in this passage, “or even could,” confirms “minds are joined.” Understanding this fact allows us to be free from fear.

 

4 When you have become willing to hide nothing, you will not only be willing to enter into communion but will also understand peace and joy.”

 4 Here’s the kicker! When we, ourselves, no longer judge our own secret as wrong and something to be ashamed of, but instead as something to be shared and used to initiate closeness, we will accept the real meaning of peace and joy. If you show yourself compassion, others usually will too.

 

Whether you are A Course in Miracles student or not, the message here is to use your secret as a way to love yourself and make a deeper connection with others.

 

If you need help with hiding the truth, contact Vickie Champion for a complimentary coaching & consulting session.

Free Will & Being Gay

Are you struggling with the possibility that you might be gay? Maybe you know you prefer the same sex, but have spent years doing everything humanly possible to change it.

Here’s where the concept of free will comes in. Most of us define it as the ability as separate individuals to make choices, as one wishes, without them being predestined by fate or divine will.

If free will is possible in this instance, wouldn’t there be more of us gays able to will or wish it away?

What if we stopped buying into the concept of free will altogether? Would that, in itself, end most of the gay shame, pain, and struggle to change what is?

A Course in Miracles states that,

“Every decision is made for the whole Sonship, directed in and out, and influencing a constellation larger than anything you have ever dreamed of.”

To me this means, instead of every individual going their own separate way and doing their own thing, that there is a Higher Power or God orchestrating a course of events so intertwined that it is beyond our comprehension. And that there is a Divine reason so many of us are now being born or turning gay—we just don’t know what it is yet.

Other passages say,

“What could you not accept, if you but knew that everything that happens, all events, past, present and to come, are gently planned by One Whose only purpose is your good?”

“And it will lead you on in ways appointed for your happiness according to the ancient plan, begun when time was born.”

And another states,

“You need to be reminded that you think a thousand choices are confronting you, when there is really only one to make. And even this but seems to be but a choice.”

To me that means, our only choice is whether we want to keep thinking we have free will, or to let God or the Higher Power show us how to be happy.

That last line goes even deeper. It only appears like we have a choice from one or the other. But, there is no opposite to choose from. Free will does not exist. There is only God or a Higher Power, and happiness to select.

For more blogs, visit the Relationship Section on my website.

If you need help with being gay, contact Vickie Champion for a complimentary coaching & consulting session.

Listening & the 3rd Dimension

We are all in the process of moving out of the egos 3rd dimension. Some of us more than others.

The 3rd dimension is about having rigid beliefs in terms of about what is right and wrong, doing things to keep crazy busy, casting blame, being fearful, and not listening to our inner guide.

 

Here are some of the listening tendencies in the 3rd dimension…

 

BLAME

When we are in the 3rd dimension, there is an overwhelming need to hold someone or something accountable. Therefore, we can tend to listen with the intention of deciding what is right and what is wrong.

 

BUSYNESS

When we are in the 3rd dimension, we constantly do things with the purpose of keeping busy. Attempting several things at once is common. Therefore, we can tend to listen with one ear. For example, we might watch TV while doing homework, or text while having a conversation with a friend.

 

EMOTIONAL

When we are in the 3rd dimension, we have a tendency to let our anger and fear control our emotions. That’s why it is extremely hard to get someone to listen in the midst of expressing rage. Therefore, negative emotions block our ability to listen.

 

SELF-CENTERED

When we are in the 3rd dimension, we can tend to make ourselves and what happens in our lives our primary focus. Conversations can easily become one sided, with no attempt to listen. If we do happen to listen, we only think about how what is being said relates to us, or we take remarks personally and get offended.

 

MIND CHATTER

When we are in the 3rd dimension, we have lots of seemingly uncontrollable thoughts, or constant chatter going through our minds. Most of the thoughts involve our to-do lists, rehashing past events, disagreeing with what’s going on, worry, and creating catastrophic scenarios. Often, the listener is thinking ahead of the talker, trying to anticipate what will be said.

 

 

IN CONCLUSION

A lot of us must be spending most of our listening time in the 3rd dimension. Why do you think the connection and clarity of wireless phones isn’t better? The ability to hear clearly is not in high demand.

Visit the entire 3rd, 4th and 5th dimension section and take the Quiz, What Dimension are You Mostly in?

Are You Ready to Get Rid of the 3rd Dimension Mindset?

This self-study course helps you change the mindset that you have about yourself and the world around you. With this program you will be able to let go of the pain you experience in the 3rd dimension and finally feel worthy. For more details.

Also check out the Quiz, How Worthy Do You Feel?

If you need help with moving up to the 4th or 5th dimension, contact Vickie Champion for a coaching and consulting session.

 

What’s the Punishment for Not Telling the Truth?

Lying and misleading others has become an epidemic and almost normal.  Are the benefits of not telling the truth out weighing the possibility of getting caught and punished for it? What about exaggerations and white lies? Surely, they can’t hurt anyone, right? But, do we ever completely escape the consequences for not telling the truth?

Not Telling the Truth…

1   Causes fear of being found out. Whether we are consciously aware of it or not, every lie, no matter how small, puts us on guard. And they add up.

2   Lowers our self-esteem a notch every time we do it. How can we be a person we admire when we are afraid to acknowledge the truth?

3   Makes it difficult to have deep meaningful relationships. Close relationships are built on honesty, and disclosure.

4   Is a short-term fix. Not being honest eventually affects other parts of our life, such as our health, career, finances, relationships, and most of all, our ability to be happy.

5   Like attracts like. If we practice misleading others, we will find that others are misleading us.

Here’s the funny thing. There are ways to be honest that escape punishment altogether, give you more benefits than you can imagine, and don’t hurt anyone in anyway—including you.

 

If you need help with keeping secrets, contact Vickie Champion for a coaching and consulting session.

 

Being Lonely & A Course in Miracles

Have you ever been so lonely, and felt so desperate, that you tried to grab someone, anyone to make you feel better? Have you noticed, even being in a romantic relationship, or in a room full of people, you can still feel just as lonely. What causes that miserable feeling to creep up on us like that, anyway?

I think at one time or another we have all run around trying to find a partner, family, friends or even strangers to rescue us from this horrible, isolated feeling.

Here’s the zinger! A Course in Miracles states,

“Only what you have not given can be lacking in any situation.”

What does that mean? Could we be seeking for the love that we already have, but are not giving? This reminds me of the song “You Get What You Give.” So, if we want to feel connected and loved, we need to extend love.

Other statements in A Course in Miracles that validate this point are…

“And every thought of love you offer him/her but brings you nearer to your awakening to peace eternal and to endless joy.”

Another is,

“Offer it and it will come to you, because it is drawn to itself.”

And yet another one,

“By giving you receive.”

That doesn’t mean we need to volunteer for a charity, buy gifts, or people please. It means all we need to do to extend love and stop our loneliness is to think loving thoughts about others. It’s that simple.

 

For more blogs, visit the Relationship Section on my website.

If you need help with your loneliness, contact Vickie Champion for a complimentary coaching & consulting session.

 

Coming Out & A Course in Miracles

Maybe you have just become aware you are gay. Maybe you are tired of fighting it and trying to be “normal.”  Maybe you have been gay for some time and were too scared to reveal it.

A Course in Miracles might take some of the sting out of coming out.

Here’s what it says…

1“The escape from darkness involves two stages: 2 First the recognition that darkness cannot hide. 3 Second, the recognition that there is nothing you want to hide or even could. This step brings escape from fear. 4 When you have become willing to hide nothing, you will not only be willing to enter into communion but will also understand peace and joy.”

Let’s Break Each Sentence Down and Explain it…

1“The escape from darkness involves two stages:

1   To me, this means if we think being gay is something to be ashamed of or think there is something wrong with it, we will consider it as “darkness.”

 

2 First the recognition that darkness cannot hide.

2   We need to realize we cannot keep secrets. At some level everyone knows that we tend to favor the same sex, whether they want to admit it or not. A Course in Miracles emphasizes “minds are joined” and that “There are no private thoughts.” That explains “gaydar” and telepathy.

 

3 Second, the recognition that there is nothing you want to hide or even could. This step brings escape from fear.

3  Deep down inside we don’t want to be ashamed of who we are. The phrase  “or even could” confirms that “minds are joined.” Understanding this fact allows us to be free from fear.

 

4 When you have become willing to hide nothing, you will not only be willing to enter into communion but will also understand peace and joy.”

 4 When we no longer treat being gay as something to be ashamed of and hidden, but to be shared and used to initiate closeness, we will accept the real meaning of peace and joy.

 

Whether you are A Course in Miracles student or not, the message here is to use coming out as a way to make a deeper connection with others.

If you need help with your relationships, contact Vickie Champion for a complimentary coaching & consulting session.

 

Romance: 12 Signs You are in the 3rd Dimension

Have you noticed it’s getting more difficult than ever before to find a mate? When we do find that perfect someone, staying in a long term relationship seems to be practically impossible. Our parents and grandparents didn’t have this much trouble. Why do we?

Part of the reason is that the 3rd dimensional mindset is in the process of collapsing. That means we are becoming less dependent on our mates and are less tolerant of embracing traditional relationship obligations.

Here’s Signs You are in the 3rd Dimensional Mindset with your Romantic Relationships…

When you…

1   Make promises, try to keep them, and then feel upset with yourself or feel betrayed when they are broken.

2   Establish compromises and sacrifice as a normal part of being in a romantic relationship. The resentment you both feel should be ignored.

3   Use the relationship to fill your needs. This could be your inability to feel safe, to be alone, to have adequate finances, to enjoy life without a special someone, or to feel worthy.

4   Use guilt to control the relationship. To control behaviors, you either feel guilty yourself or try to make your partner feel guilty.

5   Define who we think our partner is and count on them to always live up to our expectations. This could be your ability to describe in detail their personality, appearance, and future behaviors. This allows them to never grow and change in your eyes.

6   Treat them as a possession, someone who is yours and yours only. This causes undue jealousy and envy to flare up.

7   Apologize for wrongdoings and expect your partner to do the same.

8   Hide the truth or tell white lies to avoid jeopardizing the current relationship in anyway. Communicating and expressing honest thoughts and feelings can easily be ignored.

9   Define intimacy as having your special someone physically next to you. Then miss them when they are not around you.

10  Think anger and grudges are justified. You are unwilling to bend the rules and traditional beliefs.

11   Base how much you love your partner on what things they say or don’t say, and what things they do or don’t do that you like.

12   Try to avoid changes in the relationship and stay in your comfort zone.

Maybe all the pain you are experiencing in your romantic relationships is coming from trying to stay in the 3rd dimension.

But, you have a choice! You can either be one of the last holdouts in the 3rd dimension, or jump on the bandwagon and rise to the 4th and the 5th dimensions. Relationships are a lot easier and more fun when you move up.

Visit the entire 3rd, 4th and 5th dimension section and take the Quiz, What Dimension are You Mostly in?

Are You Ready to Get Rid of the 3rd Dimension Mindset?

This self-study course helps you change the mindset that you have about yourself and the world around you. With this program you will be able to let go of the pain you experience in the 3rd dimension and finally feel worthy. For more details.

Also check out the Quiz, How Worthy Do You Feel?

If you need help with moving up to the 4th or 5th dimension, contact Vickie Champion for a coaching and consulting session.

Apologizing & the 3rd, 4th, 5th Dimensions

Haven’t we all apologized to someone for doing something perceived as wrong? Maybe we were kids with our mother standing behind us making sure we followed through. None the less, we have all probably said “I’m sorry.”

Years ago, I began paying attention to how I felt when I said those words “I’m sorry.” I noticed I always felt crummy and inferior to the person I said it to afterwards. That led me to years of studying people’s reactions when they apologized to someone.

Here’s How Apologizing Relates to Each Dimension…

 

3rd Dimension Mindset

Apologizing and seeking apologies happens quite often in the 3rd dimension. Since this mindset is full of strict rules about what is right and what is wrong, placing blame, and feeling guilty, it is the perfect form of punishment.

Whether saying “I’m sorry” is heartfelt or not, it doesn’t matter much as long as the deed is done. Also, the 3rd dimension uses apologizing as a method to try to control someone’s future behaviors, which is not always successful.

Overall Purpose

To make the apologizer feel bad about what they have done.

 

4th Dimension Mindset

Instead of ignoring their thoughts like the previous mindset, someone operating in the 4th dimension is aware of their thinking, feelings, and insights. This causes more mindful actions. Therefore, there is less need to say “I’m sorry.”

When apologies are given, people in this mindset ask for inner guidance or a Higher Power to guide them, so their words are heartfelt and done in a way they don’t need to be hurt for making a mistake.

Overall Purpose

To use the mistake as a way to express love and forgiveness towards everyone involved.

 

5th Dimension Mindset

Since the 5th dimension is based on oneness and the unity consciousness, it completely dissolves the need to apologize. A Higher Power or God controls all thoughts and all actions anyone does for everyone’s highest good. The only need is to trust and ask to understand it.

Overall Purpose

To accept everyone, including ourselves, for everything all the time.

 

There is a way to avoid feeling lousy and less than the person you are apologizing too, and even a way to eliminate it all together, like what happens in the 5th dimension. All you have to do is ask, and listen to your intuition or inner guidance. Then try it.

Visit the entire 3rd, 4th and 5th dimension section and take the Quiz, What Dimension are You Mostly in?

Are You Ready to Get Rid of the 3rd Dimension Mindset?

This self-study course helps you change the mindset that you have about yourself and the world around you. With this program you will be able to let go of the pain you experience in the 3rd dimension and finally feel worthy. For more details.

Also check out the Quiz, How Worthy Do You Feel?

 If you need help with moving up to the 4th or 5th dimension, contact Vickie Champion for a coaching and consulting session.

 

Love in the 3rd, 4th, 5th Dimension

Some people think love is as simple as having someone to depend on when we need them. Others believe love is having similar interests and a companion to do things with. Yet others go beyond these definitions, taking a spiritual route to find the extreme meaning of love.

Years ago, when I was having a deep conversation with a friend, I shared my desire of becoming one with someone. She looked at me like I was crazy and responded, “Well, I have no desire to ever do that!”

 

Each Dimension Defines Love Differently. Here’s how…

3rd Dimension

The 3rd dimension tries to CONTROL LOVE. This mindset thinks love is the ability to control behaviors with expectations, fear, compromise, sacrifice, obligations, promises, and most of all, guilt.

Love is also about having SOMEONE SPECIAL of their very own, whether they call them my husband, my best friend, my mother or my twin flame. Here’s the important part! If by chance, those special people are missing in their life, this mindset believes they need to go out into the world to find them in order to have love.

 

The 3rd dimension looks for having someone that….

  • Makes them feel good by saying and doing things they like.
  • Fills a need or void in their life, such as the need for security.
  • Makes promises.
  • Is willing to be different to please them.
  • They can depend on.
  • Is uncomfortable with change.
  • Apologizes for wrongdoings.
  • Makes compromises and sacrifices.

 

4th Dimension

The 4th dimension believes love is a FEELING that reveals itself when it is extended to others. This mindset thinks love is the ability to control the love they feel with their own loving thoughts, being grateful, forgiving, and using their inner guidance.

Instead of trying to find someone special like the 3rd dimension, the 4th dimension is about EXTENDING LOVE no matter who it is with.

The 4th dimension focuses on….

  • Being happy no matter what anyone else says or does.
  • Not needing to control behaviors of others or themselves to feel better.
  • Making few promises, if any.
  • Following their inner guide, God’s voice or a Higher Power.
  • Forgiving and not taking things so seriously.
  • Practicing being grateful daily.
  • Observing their fearful and attacking thoughts. Then replacing them with loving thoughts as soon as possible.
  • Taking full responsibility for their ability to feel good.
  • Learning to love unconditionally. That means practicing not letting any condition what-so-ever, tempt them into not loving, not even for a minute.

 

5th Dimension

The 5th dimension is something to aspire to. I think we have all caught a glimpse of what ONENESS feels like, but were unable to stay in it for more than a few moments, if that. This mindset focuses on accepting everything and everyone to the point that nothing is separate.

 

Conclusion

It doesn’t matter what dimension you are in if you are fulfilled. But if you aren’t satisfied, try exploring another dimension and changing your mindset.

Visit the entire 3rd, 4th and 5th dimension section and take the Quiz, What Dimension are You Mostly in?

Are You Ready to Get Rid of the 3rd Dimension Mindset?

This self-study course helps you change the mindset that you have about yourself and the world around you. With this program you will be able to let go of the pain you experience in the 3rd dimension and finally feel worthy. For more details.

Also check out the Quiz, How Worthy Do You Feel?

 

How Telepathy Can Help Gays

If you are gay and terribly happy, you are probably not reading this—so this is for those of us still struggling with the some of the downsides of being gay.

If you haven’t guessed it by now, being gay is easier and more satisfying if we do our inner work and learn new tools to manage it. One of the tools is learning about a different way to communicate, using telepathy.

Instead of relying only on physical touch and the written or spoken word, telepathy is the ability to go deeper, picking up the thoughts and feelings of other people.

 

Here’s How Learning Telepathy Can Help Gays….  

It helps us…

  • Improve our gaydar
  • Eliminate awkwardness around same-sex friends
  • Avoid confrontations with disapproving and angry homophobics
  • Build self-confidence and self-esteem
  • Resist the urge to keep secrets from others
  • Relieve the feeling of being on guard around people
  • Get closer to God or the Higher Power

 

As you can see, learning to use telepathy can help take the fear and doubt out of being gay. To find out how easy it is to use telepathy, check out my other blogs.

 

For more about Telepathy.

If you need help with learning to develop mind reading skills, contact Vickie Champion for a complimentary coaching & consulting session.

How to Make Being Gay a Great Experience

Many of us have worked really hard, sometimes years, trying to ignore or change the fact we are gay. Sooner or later we give up and realize that the only control we really have with being gay is whether this will be the worst experience or the best experience we have ever had.

 

Here are Some Ways to Make Being Gay a Great Experience…

 

  1. Accept it. Think of it this way. There are 7 billion of us and we are all going up a mountain. Because there are so many of us, there are several paths to take. Every one of them goes to the top of the mountain. No path is wrong. They are just different paths with different experiences to offer. And no path is superior or inferior to the other paths. Once you accept your path, it gets more pleasurable.

 

  1. Get close and trust your inner guidance, God, Higher Power, or whatever you want to call it. Your path has lots of twists, turns, ups and downs so ask for help often, listen, and follow through. Navigating can be tricky at times, but it has the possibility of being a wonderful journey if you trust your guide.

 

  1. Practice being honest. You’ll find out that lying to yourself and others causes the path to become rougher and adds more fear to overcome. At first not being truthful seems like you are avoiding what scares you altogether, but really you are just pushing it down the path to be dealt with at a different time in a different circumstance. In the meantime, with each lie, the fear keeps piling up and gets harder to push, especially uphill.

 

  1. Watch your thoughts. Whether you know this or not, every thought you think causes an effect. So, if you complain, blame, get angry, or are afraid often you most likely don’t even see the path any longer through the shoulder-high weeds. What a difficult journey! But, if you see your path as a fun adventure, you have a clear path and are able to see the all the amazing gifts every step of the way.  

 

  1. Be grateful for being gay. This can be extremely hard at times to attempt, but if you even go through the motion saying you want to be grateful for the problems along the path, they will simply vanish before your eyes. This clears the path so you can see the real beauty in it. Being grateful creates more things to be grateful for.

 

If you are doing some of these 5 things even half-way, you are finding out that the experience of being gay is not that bad.

Work on it full-time and watch it become the best experience you have ever dreamed of.

 

For more blogs, visit the Relationship Section on my website.

If you need help with your relationships, contact Vickie Champion for a complimentary coaching & consulting session.

 

How to Make Being Gay a Horrible Experience

For those of us who favor the same sex, after a while we become aware that no matter what we do, we can’t change the fact that we are wired to be gay. Hopefully, we come to the realization that the only control we really have with being gay is whether this will be the worst experience we have ever had or the best experience.

Here are Some Ways to Make Being Gay a Horrible Experience…

1.   Fight it. Listen to your conservative loved ones and society. In other words, try to be normal and fit in. Date people of the opposite sex. Cut off all ties with other gays and especially people you are attracted to. And then try your damnedest not to think about them. Usually, the longer you can last, the more depressing it gets.

 

2.   Don’t ever ask God or a Higher Power for help to see being gay with a different perspective. Instead, go with religious dogma believing that “God says it’s a sin.”

 

3.   Insist on making promises to yourself, try really hard to keep them, and feel guilty when you break them. To make it even worse, make promises to others.

 

4.   Practice being dishonest. Whenever you are approached with the question of being gay, lie, and think by doing so, you have avoided all the repercussions. Convince yourself that becoming a person you do not admire won’t affect your self-esteem in any way.

To make it worse, fool yourself into thinking telepathy does not exist and the only way any one will know you are gay is if you slip up. That causes lots of pressure.

 

5.   Don’t bother with being grateful for being gay. To make the experience worse, stay focused on being a victim and how hard your life is because of it.

 

6.   Distance yourself from others. When you talk with others focus on idle chat and under no circumstances get into deep meaningful conversations. Getting too close to people might cause you to inadvertently reveal too much about yourself.

 

7.   Worry about being found out. Obsess about how certain people will react and what they would think if they knew the truth about you. Treat it like reliving bad nightmares in your head over and over. It makes you really scared. To make it even worse, often think about horrible things that have happened to others you know.

 

If you actually do these 7 things, no wonder you are angry, depressed, and having a miserable experience with being gay.

The less excruciating thing to do is to change your mind, to make being gay the best experience you have ever had. Do it and watch what happens!

 

For more blogs, visit the Relationship Section on my website.

If you need help with your relationships, contact Vickie Champion for a complimentary coaching & consulting session.

 

A Big Game Changer for Gays

Before we get started. Take three deep breaths. What I’m going to propose is something I’ve been struggling with for several years. So, don’t poo-poo it right off the bat. Just think about it.

Here it is…

Just wonder, if we had full control of whether we want to make being gay the worst experience we’ve ever had, full of punishment or the best experience we’ve ever had, full of love? Wonder if that choice alone sets in motion every event, who we meet, and what will happen along our gay journey?

I’m real sure almost all of us cannot change whether we are gay or not. But I’m pretty sure we can choose if we want the experience of it to be joyful and empowering, or to be degrading and painful.

  A Course of Miracles states,

“The test of everything on earth (in our case, being gay) is simply this; “What is it for?” The answer makes it what it is for you.”

Another section says,

“Perception seems to teach you what you see. Yet it but witnesses to what you taught. It is the outward picture of a wish; an image that you wanted to be true.”

Wow! That last sentence was a doozy. So, we could feel we are so flawed and so wrong that we actually want to be condemned and punished for it.

On the other side of this, people like Ellen DeGeneres and Neil Patrick Harris currently seem like they have chosen to make being gay the best experience they have ever had, one full of love. Ellen’s mantra is to “be kind to one another” and it seems to be paying off.

Here’s the Good News!

You can change your mind at any time and watch everything around you change accordingly.

 

For more blog, visit the Relationship Section on my website.

If you need help with your lesbian and gay relationships, contact Vickie Champion for a complimentary coaching & consulting session.

 

 

 

How to Use Telepathy with Romance

Do you want to know what your loved one is really thinking? Are you tired of doubting whether he/she is the one or not? Read on…

It’s easy to take at face value what your loved one says or writes you, but that can be so deceiving, especially within romantic relationships. There are all sorts of alternative motives for them writing or saying the things that they do.

Here are some…

  • Sex
  • To Please you
  • To follow Society Norms
  • To Please their parents or friends
  • For Money
  • Arm Candy
  • Companionship
  • Gain Status

 

For the truth, go deeper. Telepathy or mind reading is the ability to pick up the thoughts and feelings of the sender to get the whole message.

One of the easiest ways to find out what your loved one is thinking about you is really pay attention to what you are thinking and how you are feeling about them.

Don’t focus too much on what your loved one says, instead notice how you are feeling about them when they say it.

For instance, if they say “I love you,” ask yourself “Do I love them?” If the answer is NO, then they probably have an alternative motive, or they are not aware of their own true feelings. What’s really important is how you feel about them. If it’s true love, you both feel it.

So, when your loved one writes or says “sweet nothings” in your ear, it could easily be just that, “nothing” camouflaged in niceness.

 

For more about Telepathy.

If you need help with learning to develop telepathy skills, contact Vickie Champion for a complimentary coaching & consulting session.

 

How to Break Up the Loving Way

When the relationship just isn’t working, and you need to end being partners, there are really only two choices, either use FEAR to break up or  use LOVE. You can either make breaking up the worst experience you have ever had—full of anger, hurt, and conflict. Or you can make it the best experience you have ever had—in agreement, without pain, and in peace.

THE FEARFUL WAY

1  Place Blame

There is a strong tendency to be afraid of not having a good reason to break up in the first place. Then we go back and forth in our minds hunting for things that have gone or are going wrong. This could be blaming our partner, ourselves, anyone or anything, or a combination of reasons the relationship did not work out.

The main aim is to make the break up justifiable by making someone feel guilty for doing something wrong.

2  Break Up When we are Angry

In the height of emotion, we tend to attack our partner with all sorts of criticism and accusations. Our partner can quickly become defensive and then it escalates to a full blown fight.

This usually happens when we insist on breaking up in the heat of the moment and face to face. The method itself can bring up lots of fear for both parties.

It can easily feel like we are going into a huge battle full of conflict and in truth we are.

 3  The Need to Explain

When we break up the FEARFUL WAY, we have a tendency to not only explain to our partner “why,” but we have the need to get them to understand our side of it.

This could prolong the breaking up process into several discussions that could last months.

 

THE LOVING WAY

1  No Need to Blame

When we break up the LOVING WAY the reason we have to break up is that we grew apart, have little in common now, and have finished what we were supposed to do in our relationship. Nothing more than that.

2 Break up When We are Calm

When we break up the LOVING WAY there is no urgency. We are at peace and coming from our heart, waiting for God, Higher Power, or our Inner Guide to instruct us when to do it and what to say.

We are open to use the method that feels right, whether it’s written, on the phone, face to face, or something else.

3 No Desire to Justify 

When we break up the LOVING WAY there is no desire to justify it to ourselves, our partner, or anyone else. When we really go deep within, it all comes down to the fact it just feels right and we don’t have any idea “why.”

 

One of the hardest things to do is break up with someone. The purpose for everything is to learn how to LOVE in spite of who says or does what, or even if we break up or not. The problem is that if we don’t break up the LOVING WAY, we will continue to experience pain until we eventually learn how.

 

For more about LOVE and FEAR read A Course in Miracles.

If you need help with “A Course in Miracles” concepts, contact Vickie Champion for a complimentary coaching & consulting session.

 

6 Ways “A Course in Miracles” Helps Twin Flames

I’m just like almost everyone else. I needed help with this all-consuming relationship. Once I discovered the term “twin flame,” I immediately went on the internet and found lots of resources. Everyone has their own experience and take on it.

Sometimes the information made me feel better. Sometimes it gave me clues to unravelling my own twin flame journey. Sometimes it confused me. And sometimes I couldn’t relate with the authors at all.

To this day, A Course in Miracles has given me more comforting “ahas” than any other resource on how to deal with the ups, downs, twists, and turns of my twin flame relationship.

 

Here’s Some Ways It Can Help You Manage Your Twin Flame Relationship…

 

A Course in Miracles…

1   Helps us get out of the FEAR.

The whole book is a course on how to redirect and train our mind away from fearful thoughts.

 

2   Guides us to rely more on GOD or a HIGHER POWER.

Our twin flame relationship gets a lot easier when we surrender to a Source that can solve any problem and resolve any conflict without sacrifice from anyone.

 

3   Shows us how to get rid of the EGO.

The ego is a term we use for self-importance, and being independent of others, including our twin flame. Therefore, all of our struggles in the relationship come from trying to stay separate and hang onto the ego.

 

4   Teaches us how to FORGIVE.

Without forgiveness, it is impossible to really love our twin flame, end the separation, and become one.

 

5   Helps us realize the enormous power of our THOUGHTS.

Many of us get in the pattern of chasing after or running from our twin flame. Instead, all we have to do to get immediate relief with any situation is replace our judging thoughts with loving thoughts.

 

6   Inspires us by describing a glimpse of the BIGGER PICTURE.     

It’s easy to lose perspective and get hung up in the intensity of the twin flame relationship, not taking into consideration the hundreds, if not thousands, of others who will benefit from the love of our twin flame union.

 

I only listed 6, but there are countless ways A Course in Miracles can make your twin flame journey easier and less painful.

 

For a Twin Flame Course to show you how to shorten your timeline for a happy outcome. 

For several blogs and videos, visit the Twin Flame Section on my website.

For more details on my twin flame Individual Coaching Sessions.

If you need help with your twin flame relationship, contact Vickie Champion for a complimentary coaching & consulting session.

About the Twin Flame Age Difference

“I’m really having a problem that my twin is twelve years younger. Why is there such an age difference?” One of my coaching clients questioned.

I think this is undoubtedly one of the hardest difference twin flames face, especially the older one of the two. So far, not once has the subject been brought up to me with the younger of the two.

Here are Two Reasons for the Age Difference…

1  Twin flames are filled to the brim with extreme polarities, ranging from different personality traits,  income brackets,  backgrounds, religions, beliefs, and physical characteristics. The age gap is usually one of them. The opposite factor plays a significant role in what makes your unconditional love for your twin like no other.

 

2   Let’s not forget the twin flame connection has a bigger purpose for humanity, and is not a typical story book romance. Because the twin flame connection is all about breaking the norms, changing rules, and shaking things up, it would make sense that the age gap would play and important part in this. What bridges the generation gap better than a romance between two individuals growing up in different time spans?

 A Self-Study Course for Twin Flames

This program shows you how to take the heartache out of your relationship, and shorten your timeline for a happy outcome. For more details.

For several blogs and videos, visit the Twin Flame Section on my website.

For more details on my twin flame Individual Coaching Sessions.

If you need help with your twin flame relationship, contact Vickie Champion for a complimentary coaching & consulting session.

 

 

Promises, Romance, and the 3rd Dimension

The 3rd dimension is all about rules and obligations. So it would make sense that making and keeping promises in a relationship, would be a good part of that mindset.

If you are one of the very few couples who are having no problems and are perfectly happy making and keeping promises, don’t read this. But, if it’s getting harder and harder for either you or your partner to follow your commitments, here’s why…

 

Romantic Promises Tend to…

1   Give you false SECURITY about the future

2   CONTROL behaviors or at least, attempt to do so

3   Help you avoid CHANGES

4   Encourage POSSESSIVENESS

5   Push you towards taking your partner for GRANTED

6   Cause COMPROMISE and SACRIFICE

7   Lower SELF-ESTEEM when the promise has been broken

8   Foster CONDITIONAL LOVE

9   Put you on AUTO-PILOT, causing you to IGNORE your thoughts, feelings, and insights

10 Slow down PERSONAL GROWTH

11 Allow you to neglect your INNER GUIDANCE or intuition

 

When you look at these components broken down, no wonder the old worn out 3rd dimension consciousness, full of rules, obligation, and compromise is in the process of collapsing. I think most of us are ready to experience unconditional love, living in the present, and using our inner guidance or intuition instead.

Visit the entire 3rd, 4th and 5th dimension section and take the Quiz, What Dimension are You Mostly in?

Are You Ready to Get Rid of the 3rd Dimension Mindset?

This self-study course helps you change the mindset that you have about yourself and the world around you. With this program you will be able to let go of the pain you experience in the 3rd dimension and finally feel worthy. For more details.

Also check out the Quiz, How Worthy Do You Feel?

If you need help with moving up to the 4th or 5th dimension, contact Vickie Champion for a coaching and consulting session.

How are Twin Flames, Soul Mates, & Obsessive Relationships the Same?

Everyone talks about the many differences. Twin Flames are supposed to be the union that helps mankind. Soul Mate relationships are usually known for deep connections between two people that have similar mindsets. And Obsessive Relationships are usually thought of as one sided, where feelings of infatuation become extreme.

But, What Do They Have in Common?

The purpose.

All relationships, no matter what form they come in, are for us to learn how to unconditionally love the other person no matter what they say or do.

Don’t get me wrong!

That doesn’t mean we have to stay in a relationship that isn’t working or even talk to our partner again. But, it does mean that we stop judging them long enough to see another perspective, open our hearts, and love them in spite of it.

We are here, not to find love, but to learn how to give it.

 

 A Course for Twin Flames

This program shows you how to take the heartache out of your relationship, and shorten your timeline for a happy outcome. For more details.

For several blogs and videos, visit the Twin Flame Section on my website.

For more details on my Individual Coaching Sessions.

If you need help with your twin flame relationship, contact Vickie Champion for a complimentary coaching & consulting session.

 

What Makes an Amazing Relationship?

I talk with people all the time in my life coaching practice that have mediocre, at best, romantic relationships. Most don’t even know what a great relationship is, let alone have one. Which type of romantic relationship are you in?

Here’s What Makes an Amazing Romantic Relationship…

When we…

  • Feel good inside every time we are near our partner, talk to them or even think about them.
  • Both have learned to be excellent listeners without ever taking anything personal.
  • Notice our eyes light up when they walk into the room.
  • Have the best time with each other even doing the most boring, ordinary things.
  • Focus on having real quality time. You know, when you get rid of outside distractions and are fully present in the moment with our partner.
  • Both feel free to talk from the heart and share our beliefs, fears, and dreams without concern.
  • Can’t remember the last time we felt guilty or apologized to our partner.
  • Give and receive affection freely.
  • Cherish our time together and our time apart.
  • Have daily moments of appreciation just for being in our partner’s life.
  • Are constantly aware of our inner guidance or intuition with the relationship.
  • Can truly be ourselves.
  • Feel a connection that is incomparable to anything else.

Now, wouldn’t a relationship with all of these qualities be something! Perhaps you would like to experience it more than anything else. Or maybe you have had it and then watched it fade away.

Here’s what I have learned. The ability to get and keep an amazing relationship is based on our own inner work and mindset. The upcoming blogs will explain more about what’s required to always have this amazing connection.

If you need help on how to have an amazing relationship, contact Vickie Champion for a discovery coaching and consulting session.

By Vickie Champion

21 Signs You Have a Good Relationship

If you’ve read my previous blogs you can recognize the signs you’re in a bad relationship. And, hopefully, if you’re in a relationship now you can identify more than a handful of these hints that signal you’re in a good relationship.

When you…

  • Look forward to seeing or talking with your partner.
  • Laugh and act playful together.
  • Feel completely relaxed in their presence.
  • Often make eye contact.
  • Don’t depend on what your partner says or does to be happier.
  • Both have learned to give and receive affection.
  • Enjoyalone time with your partner.
  • Feel sexy.
  • Are not afraid to spend time apart.
  • Take time to express heartfelt “thank you’s.”
  • Make it a practice to follow your inner guidance or intuition.
  • Go beyond small talk sharing your fears, ideas, and dreams.
  • Feel connected and satisfied with the relationship.
  • Have gone beyond misunderstandings.
  • Like the person you have become in the relationship.
  • Hardly ever use your partner as a topic of conversation with others.
  • Realize that good relationships don’t require sacrifice and compromises are not necessary and can actually break down the relationship.
  • Have no problem forgiving and sometimes even forgetting it ever happened.
  • Lose track of time when you are together.
  • Focus on giving and receiving when making love.
  • Make it a habit to focus on the things going right in the relationship, not the  problems. What we focus on expands.

Maybe you selected one or two or even a dozen ways to improve your relationship from the above list.  And maybe you also picked up on what many of these good relationship signs have in common.  Did you? It’s that we can have a profound impact on the joy and love we give and get from our relationships simply by shifting our perspective and taking little actions to support that.

If you need help on how to have a good relationship, contact Vickie Champion for a discovery coaching and consulting session.

By Vickie Champion

34 Subtle Signs You are in a Bad Relationship

This isn’t about the obvious REALLY toxic relationships. You know, the ones that are full of jealousy, abuse, overdependence, or manipulative and controlling behavior. I’ll leave that to the therapists.

Here are some not-so-obvious hints you have a bad relationship…

When you…

  • Have a habit of blaming each other for one thing or another.
  • Feel guilty and apologize at least once a month.
  • Stay crazy busy most of the time.
  • Repeatedly take things too seriously.
  • Feel lonely and unconnected.
  • Want your partner to appreciate you more.
  • Find your friends and family avoid being around you and/or your partner.
  • Have little disagreements here and there.
  • Want to spend more and more time apart.
  • Fear telling the truth about some things.
  • Can list at least more cons than pros about your partner.
  • Have excuses to stay with your partner, like for the sake of the kids or for financial reasons.
  • No longer feel good about yourself.
  • Have tried to make your partner “everything.”
  • Don’t have much in common anymore.
  • Change your looks, behaviors, and dreams just to please your partner.
  • Go along with your partners decisions because it’s easier.
  • Are defensive.
  • Stay with them because they say they “I love you.”
  • Don’t like the person you have become.
  • Make problems with your partner a topic of conversation with your friends.
  • Have loved ones suggesting you hire a life coach or get couples therapy.
  • Find yourself compromising more than not.
  • Feel trapped.
  • Lack the willingness to forgive some things.
  • Stop paying attention to how you feel.
  • At timesdread seeing or talking to them.
  • Make conscious sacrifices for the sake of the relationship.
  • Feel you would be happier if your partner spoke or acted differently.
  • Do things just to please your partner.
  • Find yourself resenting other couples’ relationships.
  • Don’t feel like it’s a 50/50 partnership.
  • Let your partner hurt your feelings.
  • Have gained weight, or picked up an unhealthy habit to relieve stress.

If you can identify with some of these bad relationship signs it doesn’t mean your relationship is doomed. Or that you necessarily have a heap of self improvement work ahead of you. Sometimes you can change your relationships simply by changing the way you think. Truly!  And it can be done without making sacrifices or changing who you are.

If you need help on how to improve your relationship, contact Vickie Champion for a discovery coaching and consulting session.

32 Ways to Ruin a Relationship

Maybe things in your relationship could be better. And maybe your partner will come around to doing the things he or she ought to be doing. But first, are you? Are you sabotaging your relationship in small, insidious ways?

When you…

  • Put expressing “I love you” on auto-pilot, saying it at least once a day.
  • Over-apologize or expect your partner to.
  • Bring up past mistakes.
  • Strongly believe that a good relationship requires you to make sacrifices and compromises.
  • Are too available.
  • Never have an opinion on anything.
  • Think about your body size, shape or the amount of wrinkles when making love.
  • Hide the truth so you won’t hurt their feelings.
  • Change your looks and behaviors only to please your partner.
  • Let them make your decisions for you.
  • Focus on what they are doing wrong and their faults.
  • Stop communicating and expressing your thoughts and feelings.
  • Spend more money than you have.
  • Believe if your partner looked or acted differently you would be happier.
  • Don’t take time to have fun and laugh together.
  • Let days go by without saying a kind word or making a loving gesture.
  • Expect your partner to fill a void in your life.
  • Stop looking your partner in the eyes whenever possible.
  • Take them for granted.
  • Don’t practice tough love ever and allow them to remain in an unhealthy comfort zone.
  • Ignore that your core values are not aligned.
  • Try to numb yourself and pay very little attention to how you are feeling about anything.
  • Tell white lies because you are afraid of your partner’s reaction.
  • Stop listening, or better yet, get such busy lives you just pass in the night.
  • Are together too much, excluding friends and family.
  • Believe the inability to get along with your partners friends and family has no effect on your relationship.
  • Take your partners comments personally and make it a habit to be defensive about them.
  • Complain to anybody who will listen about your partner.
  • Confide only to your friends and family, excluding your partner entirely.
  • Micro-manage your partner.
  • Require your partner be faithful, but refuse to meet their sexual needs.
  • Criticize your looks and actions daily.

Good relationships are joyful, comforting, inspiring, nurturing and a thousand other uplifting nouns.  And relationships — good or bad — help us grow. If you identified with some of these relationship-ruining habits you’re not perfect. That’s OK. But you may want to choose one or two areas to examine and even attempt to change so your relationship can strengthen and grow.

If you are ready to stop ruining your relationships, contact Vickie Champion for a discovery coaching and consulting session.

10 Reasons it is So Hard to Forgive

If forgiveness were always easy the self-help section of the bookstore wouldn’t be lined with titles telling people how to do just that. Take heart and know that you’re not the only one who struggles with forgiveness.  Identifying why forgiveness is difficult for you, however, could be the first step in resolving the anger issue that’s holding you back from happiness.

Here’s 10 Reasons it is So Hard to Forgive…

1  We might feel trust is broken or we’ve been betrayed.

2  We don’t want to let them off the hook.

3  We think forgiveness means that we let them in our lives again.

4  If we forgive and forget it will happen again.

5  When we want to feel superior. This usually happens when we want an apology.

6  We believe anger stops it from happening again.

7  We believe our resentment can punish others.

8  We want them to take responsibility for their actions.

9  We want then to be willing to remedy the situation.

10  We believe we must forgive the truth and not our perception of it.

Another reason why there are so many books about the art of forgiveness is because it’s important.  Forgiving someone — and often ourselves — can lead to a greater awareness, a shift in stuck energy and a happier, more blissful life.

 

Visit the About Forgiveness section.

To help you learn to forgive, contact Vickie Champion for a discovery coaching and consulting session.

8 Signs You Have NOT Forgiven Someone

Forgiveness can be like cleaning out your closet. At first, it’s dreaded as one difficult, if not impossible, task. But once the contents have been cleared, sorted and organized, everything feels better – lighter.
Do the contents of your spirit need to be assessed? Forgiveness is one pathway toward clearing and freeing the spirit. We can say we have forgiven someone, but have we?

Here’s how to tell if you still need to do more forgiveness work-

When you…

1   Use what the person said or did as a topic of conversation.

2   Daydream about getting revenge or some kind of justice. A good example of this is attending your high school reunion and showing them.

3   Preoccupy your mind day in and day out either reliving or dwelling on the situation or the person’s behaviors.

4   Get annoyed if someone even mentions the person.

5   Have a tendency to avoid the person.

6   Are secretly delighted to hear about the person’s current difficulties and losses.

7   Strongly believe you have been unfairly treated and are an innocent victim.

8   Have friends and family that are tired of talking about the person and the latest drama.

Forgiveness is usually more of a process than we are willing to admit. If there’s still work to do, that’s OK! Now you know that you need to continue the process of forgiving to create a lighter, more expansive you.

To help you learn to forgive, you can also contact Vickie Champion for a discovery coaching and consulting session to overcome your guilt.

Feel Worthy COURSE

This self-study program helps you change the mindset you have about yourself to be able to finally feel worthy. For more details.

Also check out the Quiz, How Worthy Do You Feel?

 

Signs you Really Need to Improve a Relationship!

Are you person A? The Avoider? You have a difficult relationship with a client, boss, co-worker, friend, spouse or any other relationship so you spend much of your day on autopilot. You are desperately trying to eliminate all thoughts and dealings with him or her. Out of sight, out of ear-shot, out of mind, you think.

Or are you person B? The Bad Mouther? You spend a lot of your time thinking about what that person said or did, and, in fact, bad mouthing them to anyone who will listen?

Here are Some More Signs we Really Need to Improve a Relationship…

When we…

  • Are scared to tell that person the truth.
  • Have verbal arguments.
  • Find ourselves judging that person and telling others.
  • Go over and over in our minds what we need to do about a situation and how that person will react to it.
  • Think it’s easier to give in than irritate that person.
  • Pay little attention, if any, to how we’re feeling about the situation.
  • Say yes to that person when we really want to say no.
  • Depend on the relationship to be successful.
  • Start taking that person for granted.
  • Notice that person is either avoiding or scared of us.

By taking the time to improve our difficult relationships we can become person C, the Choice maker. It’s up to us, we can continue our difficult  relationship with that person or choose instead to improve it and benefit from it.

You can also contact Vickie Champion for a discovery coaching and consulting session.

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Vickie Champion

Twin Flame Coach & Life Coach
and Adviser
My consistent approach is listening to my intuition, inner guide, or gut feelings to guide me toward helping my clients where they need it the most. Results can be quick and often surprise my clients. My coaching is about achieving results and breaking old patterns. Contact me today to get started:
602-663-2006

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