To get clarity let’s start off with the different words we can use to describe our anger. Here are some of them.
Being…
Annoyed Upset Frustrated Mad Furious
Disappointed Vengeful Resentful Irritated Displeased
No matter how we want to describe our anger, it comes down to this simple explanation.
Anger is when we expect ourselves, someone else, or anything else to be different than it is.
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Ways Being Angry Directly Affects You
1 ANGER MAKES US TAKE CONTROL
Because anger comes from having expectations, it keeps us focused on trying to change others or the world the way we think it should be. You have probably noticed that it is extremely hard to do for any length of time and ends up causing us more work and increasing our anger. It’s exhausting!!!
2 ANGER IS A REPELLANT
Anger makes us unpleasant to be around. If we express our anger by verbally or physically lashing out, it can easily scare or embarrass others. If we tend to be judgmental or close-minded, it causes others to not be themselves or not be totally honest with us. Essentially, it tends to make others want to limit interaction with us or try to avoid us altogether.
3 ANGER SABOTAGES OUR LIFE
When we are angry at someone, some group, or something, there is a consequence attached to it. The angrier we are the harsher the consequence.
Every thought we have causes an effect.
Angry people tend to get sick or have injuries, have more financial problems, are in difficult relationships, get fired from jobs, have fewer opportunities come their way, have more accidents, and any other negative thing you can think of.
Here’s the kicker!!! What we are angry about, and what happens doesn’t need to be directly related to it or even close to the same subject. If we are angry with our partner, we could gain lots of weight. If we are upset with our boss, we can get in a car accident.
4 ANGER CREATES A FEAR OF RETALIATION
If we want others to be punished for what we think they did “wrong,” then we will be afraid we will be punished. This can easily cause us to be on guard and always on the lookout for a counterattack. The angrier we are, the stronger the fear.
We will be afraid others will do to us what we did to them.
5 ANGER LOWERS OUR SELF-RESPECT
Every time we let ourselves get angry over something or how someone is behaving, our ability to feel worthy drops a notch. To feel good about ourselves, we have to be the person we would admire.
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Check out the Inner Work on my website.
And, if you need an advisor to help you on your quest, contact Vickie Champion for a coaching and consulting session at a discounted price.