Feeling poorly about yourself? Like you could and should do better? Maybe it’s guilt. Guilt acts as a negative detour in our lives, prohibiting us from taking care of ourselves, being kind to ourselves, and pursuing our dreams, among other things.
Here Might Be Some Reasons for Feeling Guilty
1 Filing bankruptcy.
2 Not doing it all, being the super mom or dad.
3 Getting divorced.
4 Ending a relationship.
5 Gaining weight.
6 Not caring for our elderly parents properly.
7 Cheating on a spouse.
8 Losing a loved one.
9 Not working or working too much.
10 Spending too much money.
11 Eating forbidden foods, you know, the ones full of sugar.
12 Doing nothing. We think we need to fix everything for everybody.
13 Not having a knock-em-dead gorgeous body.
14 Spending money on self-growth, hobbies, or self-care like massages. An exception is if anything is used to achieve a knock-em-dead gorgeous body.
15 Receiving praise we feel is undeserved.
What Makes Feeling Guilty Worse
The amount of guilt we feel and how often we feel it can depend on these things.
Here’s What Makes the Intensity and Frequency of Feeling Guilty Worse…
1 WHEN WE PUT OTHERS FIRST, NO MATTER WHAT.
We’ll do and buy things for everyone else and then feel guilty when we consider those things for ourselves.
Those who don’t feel guilty as much tend to think they are at least equal to others.
2 WHEN WE WORRY ABOUT EVERYTHING.
This can be anything from being in debt, if the furniture just purchased is the right color, to whether something we said might have possibly hurt someone’s feelings.
Those who don’t feel guilty as much tend to put their focus more on achieving their dreams.
3 WHEN WE STRIVE TO BE A PERFECTIONIST.
If we make mistakes, we feel guilty.
Those who don’t feel guilty as much tend to think mistakes are a way to find out what won’t work to solve the problem or achieve their goals.
4 WHEN WE BELIEVE SAYING “NO” IS NOT LOVING AND DOWNRIGHT WRONG.
That makes us program ourselves to say “yes” every time because saying “no” makes us feel guilty.
Those who don’t feel guilty as much tend to use their intuition or gut instincts before answering. They know some of that sometimes the right and most loving thing to do is to say “yes” and some of the time it is to say “no.”
5 WHEN WE REFLECT AND ANALYZE A LOT.
With this, there comes a tendency to judge ourselves about every little thing.
6 WHEN WE TAKE CONTROL.
We can go to extremes with this—trying to hold everything together like helping the kids with their homework, decorating our home, buying gifts for relatives, planning holidays, making sure there is something in the fridge, taking care of our aging parents, and paying all the bills, just to name a few. Then, as if that wasn’t enough control, we often want to take responsibility for others’ feelings, do their chores, and try solving their problems the whole time feeling good about our multi-tasking abilities.
Those who don’t feel guilty as much tend to think their world won’t fall apart if they drop the ball.
Did you know Feeling Guilty causes you to feel Unworthy?
I have a self-study course or program that helps you change the mindset you have about yourself to be able to finally feel worthy. For more details.
Also check out the Quiz, How Worthy Do You Feel?
If you need help forgiving yourself, contact Vickie Champion for coaching and consulting sessions.